Couples and singles often view each other with a mix of confusion, suspicion, and, sometimes, straight-up hostility. We all know, deep down, that someone’s relationship status doesn’t define them or instantly turn them into a cliche, but that sure doesn’t stop most of us from making some ridiculous generalizations — even if we’ve personally been on both sides of the coin. Are your married friends sublimely happy all the time just because they’re married? No way! Is your single friend really free to dog sit for you anytime because she has no life? Nope. We wanted to debunk some of these ridiculous misconceptions as a reminder that we’re all on the same team. Here are some of the most common misguided assumptions single people make about couples (and vice versa). Read on to see what assumptions you might be making…
Misconceptions Singles Have About Couples:
1. That when you see them walking down the street, holding hands and making shmoopy face, that they’re so in love. Maybe you just caught them at a good moment, right after a fight. Or maybe it’s their first date!
2. That their sex life must be played out and boring or that they’re having hot, mind-blowing sex a million times a day. It’s probably somewhere in between.
3. That their lives are perfect BECAUSE they’re in a relationship. Bwahahahaha!
4. That they don’t have time for their single friends anymore. That’s all in your head. Just ask them to hang out alone and you’ll probably get a resounding YES.
5. That their partner 100 percent knows and gets everything about them. Um, no. That’s why they want to hang out with you.
6. That life is easier when you have a shoulder to lean on 24/7. Believe it or not, sometimes it’s actually harder because you have two sets of problems to worry about instead of one.
7. That their pre-existing personal problems disappeared when they became a couple. Still alive and kicking.
8. That they never are attracted to or get crushes on other people. You don’t cease being human just because you’re in a relationship.
9. That they either never fight or bicker constantly. Eh, It depends on the day.
10. That they’ve somehow magically figured out how to be a grownup in a way you haven’t. If you know the secret to being a grownup, please share.
11. That they’re bored or boring. Sitting in front of the TV not talking is not a regular couples activities. Chances are we’re busy and don’t get to spend that much time together, so when we do, we’re catching up on each other’s lives.
12. That they never get sick of each other. Even if they don’t spend that much time together, when you know a person really well, it’s really easy to get sick of them, especially when they’re in a crap mood.
13. That they never wish they were single sometimes. Yes, sometimes we wish we could come home and have control of the TV for hours on end.
Misconceptions Couples Have About Singles:
1. That they’re lonely. Maybe every so often, like on holidays or during weddings, but otherwise, not so much.
2. That they go out every night. Being single doesn’t preclude you from having to go to bed at a reasonable hour so you can go to work the next date.
3. That they need help finding a date. Specifically, that they need YOUR help finding a date and you shouldset them up with any other single human that you know.
4. That their life is wild and exciting. If you consider having control of the TV for hours on end exciting, then YES!
5. That they’re having tons of one-night stands or experiencing an epic dry spell. Maybe a little bit of both, but mostly sex with yourself.
6. That they’re available to pet sit or babysit anytime. Believe it or not, single people have schedules too.
7. That they’re out to steal your man. It’s happened once or twice, but generally, singles aren’t looking for a taken person.
8. That they want to entertain you with all their crazy date stories. As much as you might love hearing about their latest epic mismatch, talking about their horrendous OKCupid date last night is not particularly funny to them.
9. That they want to come to your place because theirs is such a sad, dirty bachelor pad. Contrary to popular belief, single people keep more than a block of cheese, a six-pack of beer and a tub of Nutella in their fridge.
10. That they’re less responsible/mature/evolved than people in relationships. In fact, it just might be the opposite.
11. That they must be doing something wrong. Don’t try to figure it what their “problem” is if you don’t want to get punched.
12. That their only goal in life is coupling up/getting married. Mind-blowing fact: Some people choose to be single.
13. That they will be jealous if you talk about how in love you are. Probably more like HAPPY FOR YOU.